Not a Unicorn, Just a Donkey with a Funny Hat

He never showed up for his first day.  The first rule of hiring a new dishwasher: if he seems too good to be true, he probably is.  Here’s the math, if you’re into that sort of thing: former cook + restaurant prep experience = a dishwasher who will not show up.

My hopes of switching over to my happy new full-time prep schedule after a suitable replacement had been found were dashed to pieces like a freshly tapped brûléed caramel lid.  The new schedule had been drawn up, my daytime prep hours had been spelled out, and a return to a normal, sane sleep schedule had been so close I could taste it–it tasted it like the meals I would actually be able to share with my fiancee.  But nope.  It was back to the hiring board.  Jermaine, I hardly knew you.

If I haven’t made it perfectly clear already, this is not a job you do for the money.  In lieu of an otherwise motivating agenda, this is a job you do to eek by.  And that makes us dishwashers, on average, a fickle lot, because $10 an hour is just not always incentive enough to show up.  A reliable dishwasher is a unicorn, worth his weight in steak tartare, but paid like crap.  Ergo, the restaurant industry suffers from a distinct shortage of reliable dishwashers.  And clearly, the math on that works out to a whole lot of complaining from me as the search continues.


Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in: Logo

You are commenting using your account. Log Out /  Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )


Connecting to %s